3 posts tagged “dreams”

In the year 50XX, Tom Butts sent his assistant back in time in a time machine to the year 2023 to bring back Cow and Chicken in their entire house to put in his Buttopolis Museum of Natural History. It turns out, though, that Chicken is highly allergic to the chemical Tangerine, which causes him to become the kid that played Sam in the transformers movies and jack himself off into insensibility. As Chicken himself peers in through the window of Butts office at the jacking videos caused by the chemical Tangerine, he mutters a derisive 'yuck'.

"Ew!" Butts wails. "The 'yuck'-kid yucked at my house!"

In the house where Cow and Chicken live, Chicken becomes a cute young girl who also has odd masturbating tendencies when exposed to Tangerine, but it's not that bad. Chicken remains Sam and invites his best friend over to his house when their mother ends up going to the hospital to give birth to their third baby. His friend is an absolute recreational wanker and isn't ashamed about it, saying they should let Cow/Sister play outside in their backyard. It turns out that Chicken/Sam's house is backed up onto mounds of blue and green naturally occuring Tangerine at the top of their plateau property. Chicken/Sam tries his best to keep himself from beating off as he scolds Cow/Sister to get back from the cliff side as Wanker/Friend heads back into the house.

"Mom and Dad will only be back tomorrow," she said snarkily. "Are you sure you want to get mad at me?"

Then I wake up. o_0

You know I have dreamed about the same man twice before in my life. Usually this dream ends up as said man ending up with the prettier girl. However, today, in the third time I've dreamed of him, I'm the one who came out on top. Yes. Finally, even in my dreams, he ends up with me. And he snogged me specially on New Year's Day. Yes, I snogged. It was wet.

Is this a Sign of things to come? I'll keep a lookout on new-year's, though I have a suspicion that nothing will happen. Sadly, somewhere along the way when physical contact or beyong a certain point in flirtation, my secret horrific, crippling shyness will step in and I become painfully socially dumb. It is my bane that has kept me single.

Then again, life has been simplified for me. I think if you threw a man in over the work, family and fish problems I have, I'd probably go insane. Who knows, maybe I might end up settling for the just the snogging. Was that a pig I just saw fly by?! WOW!

There are days when I am a surly cur. I wasn't like this before - or rather, it wasn't as bad. I peg this to my cessation of vitamin supplements after the BBC reported that taking too much vitamin E could cause you some kind of damage or other. With the lack of a steady supply of the assorted vitamin Bs, my mood, energy and temperament have deteriorated leading to poor pupils being tormented in the day time and poor friends having to deciper my weird spelling and typoes.

Then again, it's not my fault I get irritated so easily. I'm beginning to feel the drudgery of the job, where the new and exciting slowly becomes the dull and routine. The only excitement these days I get comes from 7 year olds being themselves and getting hurt in new, inventive and imbecilic ways. Spice this with the occasional obscure complaint from a malcontent parent, and you've pretty much highlighted all the fun in my life.

I do like fish - keeping them, not eating them. I have too many fish tanks and not enough boyfriends. I replace men with fish. Fish are quieter and do not need to be reminded to bathe.

And now it is past 1am, so I shall take my surliness to my bed as I end off this disjointed entry of random verbal diarrhea.